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Wednesday, March 14, 2012

It's no surprise to me, I am my own worst enemy

If there is one area of my life that I am really picky about and strive for perfection in, it is my professional side. I will say, with confidence, that I am a damn good employee. I will work extra hours, I will take on extra responsibilities, I pride myself on doing a good job.

I am also extremely critical of myself when I make a mistake. I know we are all human and no one is perfect, we all make errors. I get that. Unfortunately, I am so aware of the mistakes that I make that I get overly uptight over it.

I made one of those mistakes this week. I didn't know that I had to make a change in the system and a payment went out that shouldn't have. The big boss is not happy, my manager told me he will have to give me the lecture and they do understand that I am still new to the job, but the lecture will be coming anyway. *sighs* I told him that it didn't matter what he had to say, I can guarantee that I kicked myself harder than he could ever imagine. I didn't sleep Monday night, in fact. It plagued my mind.

I don't know how to accept the "you're only human" excuse. While no, I didn't know about the change I had to make to stop the payment as I wasn't trained about it, I still own up to the mistake and it is not easy to handle.

Vacation tomorrow cannot come fast enough!!

3 comments:

Natalie Aaron said...

Michelle - I hate it when I make a mistake too but try not to be so hard on yourself!! You work very hard and we all make mistakes.
Big sigh...and Thor will make it all better!

Anonymous said...

Michelle, as a people pleaser - I am crushed when I feel that I have disappointed someone with a a mistake. It happens, but it sure seems soul crushing - just remember that it will pass. And I recommend Thor and ice cream!

Unknown said...

Thor and ice cream can only bring you back to smiles! I am hard on myself too, Miche. I try really hard to dust myself off, and file what went wrong away for next time. I think that the mistakes we make in life are such great lessons for how NOT to do things when the same situation comes around again. Girl, we are only human. And now you are on vacation so ALL IS FANTASTIC! XO

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